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Parents' Guide to Family Discussion On Internet Usage |
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Time Online
Discuss how much time your children are allowed to spend online, and whether their computer use is based upon having completed certain tasks (ie: homeowork, household jobs, etc.)
Location/Supervision
Decide whether there are restrictions or guidelines on the physical locations of where children may go while online. Are they allowed to go online at school? Are they allowed to go online at a friend's house? Are they allowed to go online if there are no adults around? Is the computer screen positioned so that an adult may readily see it?
Personal Information
Children should never give our their personal information to anyone but especially not through the internet: Full name, address, telephone numbers, their school, their photographs, their clubs or affiliations such as sports teams, etc.
Websites
Talk about what types of websites are okay for your children to visit and which are off-limits to them. Are your children limited to those sites which are related to school work or those specifically for "kids"?
"Social" Websites - My Space, FaceBook, Etc.
Facebook's terms of use
Eligibility
Membership in the Service is void where prohibited. This Site is intended solely for users who are thirteen (13) years of age or older, and users of the Site under 18 who are currently in high school or college. Any registration by, use of or access to the Site by anyone under 13, or by anyone who is under 18 and not in high school or college, is unauthorized, unlicensed and in violation of these Terms of Use. By using the Service or the Site, you represent and warrant that you are 13 or older and in high school or college, or else that you are 18 or older, and that you agree to and to abide by all of the terms and conditions of this Agreement.Most of the websites which are very popular among elementary school children are sites which were never intended for children and young teens. MySpace and FaceBook were actually designed for college students as a social forum intended to bridge the distance between college students all over the world. These websites have a minimum user or member age standard and so, are, in fact, illegal for students under the site's stated minimum age to join or use. Note that facebook's terms of use state that "...13 or older and in high school or college...". This means that Queen of Apostles School students should NOT be using these websites as they are not in high school.
The greatest danger inherent in these types of websites is that your child will, after a very short time, disclose personal information to "friends" (someone with whom they have either chatted online or exchanged a few instant messages or emails) thinking that this information is private or otherwise "OK" to type into their computer. PLEASE NOTE: The internet is a public forum. It is not private. Everything you "publish" is going to be there forever and for anyone to read or view (pictures are especially dangerous even if they are non-explicit or "G-rated" as such may be manipulated digitally and altered to a possibly embarassing or harmful effect for your child). Your child may be computer literate enough to "wipe away" or "erase" his or her internet history however, please make it clear to your child that you expect to have access to any and all internet sites they have visited and let them know that you will be checking the sites they visit on a regular basis. This is not an invasion of your child's privacy but is a "high-tech" means of helping to protect and guide your child. The computer is being used as a social communication tool but, unlike telephones or letter writing where there is a certain expectation of privacy, the internet is NOT PRIVATE and much of it is intended for adults, not children.
Unsupervised and unchecked internet use by your child is comparable to sending them out the door without knowing where they are going or with whom they will be associating or even what they will be doing. Any parent would not even consider allowing their children to leave the house without knowing these things but most parents don't realize that your computer with internet access is a much more dangerous gateway to the world than is your front door. If you keep your door locked, shouldn't you also similarly guard the door which is your computer? Children feel safe and secure when on the computer at home but should be made aware of the unsafe and insecure reality of internet activity.
Meeting On-line "Friends"
Children should never meet an on-line "friend" unless a parent is present.
Chat Rooms
Younger children should never be permitted to be in chat rooms. You should explore a few chat rooms with your older children and discuss them. Decide your own comfort level about on-line "chatting" and discuss your rules for on-line activities with your children. Find monitored chat rooms with your children. (Search monitored chat rooms and one for kids of all ages will show up)
Inappropriate Material On-line
Children should never respond when they are uncomfortable or frightened by something they receive or encounter on-line. If and when this occurs, children must be taught to inform an appropriate adult right away. It is an unfortunate reality that one absolutely will encounter inappropriate material on the internet. There are two ways your children will encounter inappropriate material on the computer, either the child is actively searching for inappropriate material or one comes across it by accident. Your child needs to know how to handle the situation if inappropriate material is encountered while on-line so, please discuss the issue before it becomes an ISSUE.
The Golden Rule
Remind your children that they need to behave toward others as they would like others to behave toward them. Cyberbullying is just as harmful as "real-time" bullying.
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